We have a lot of major projects brewing around here. One of them is a first birthday party and another one is this…

We finally pulled the trigger and ordered a build your own outdoor kitchen kit. That picture is one I Photoshopped for our “planning it out” post 2 years ago. It shipped today and we may be certifiably insane.

But it should be fun, right? RIGHT??

::deep breaths::

Thank you all for your encouraging words about my last post. I think that for now, I’m going to stick with the good ol’ post when I want to/have time to. No one will be pinning this as “How to build a successful blog!”, but eh, it’s what’s going to work for me. Flying by the seat of my pants vs. rigid planning. It’s how I roll.

We’re currently knee deep in planning some landscaping out back and a first birthday party. The landscaping could probably take over a 6 part series here, so I’ll have to save that story for another day. For Easton’s party, I spent the last two nights designing invitations all by myself. Yes, my Photoshop skills are growing leaps and bounds at a snail’s pace. Maybe I’ll share what I came up with once they arrive and I know that I didn’t totally mess up.

I also need to realize that sometimes short posts, posts with only words or posts with only pictures are okay. Instagram takes over a lot of those types of posts these days, but it doesn’t mean that if I feel like I only have a short thought, I can’t drop in here and share it. Today is one of those days!

I dropped in on the West Elm website to check if the Tali window panels had gone on sale yet (nope) and I somehow ended up browsing furniture. Here are my 3 random finds…

1. Graham Glider

I felt like I had to shout it from the rooftops for anyone who has asked me about our Lacey glider, which was discontinued. Guys, West Elm sells a glider!! It’s $799 so it’s pricey, but given the amount of time each day that I sit in ours, I think I would buy this in a heartbeat. Since it’s pricier, I would probably forgo the ottoman because I don’t use it all the time, but it’s nice to have if you can swing it.

2. Rustic Dining Chairs

In another post for another day, our kitchen table set is falling apart. You get what you pay for and well, it was cheap from a big box furniture store. I have been drooling over these Rustic Dining Chairs for a few weeks and even scoured Craigslist for used ones. No luck yet.

3. Wood Tiled Nightstand

This is another piece I am madly in love with and our current nightstands leave so much to be desired. Dark bedroom walls, DIY upholstered headboard and these babies? I’m going to dream about it tonight.

One of the contestants in East Coast Creative’s Creating with the Stars competition made one of these. It was amazing, but I’m not sure I’m that much of a dedicated DIYer.

That wraps up my random finds this week. Anyone else think that West Elm is killing it in the furniture department lately?

ps- West Elm didn’t pay me for this, I’m just browsing around 🙂

It’s me.

I didn’t plan to formally say this, but I also didn’t plan to take a break for as long as I did. So, yeah I needed a blogging break.

I hate to bog you all down with the “I’m busy”, woe-is-blogger type of posts, but I also know that many of you can relate. I’ll start out by saying that being a working parent is hard, scratch that, being any parent is hard. Mommy guilt is a killer. I’ve said it before when my maternity leave ended and it’s gotten better in a lot of ways. But in many others ways, it’s still hard. This blog is one of those ways.

I still struggle with how to fit this blog into my “new” life. Don’t get me wrong, me, myself and I love everything about what I write here. I will always be watching HGTV, browsing Pinterest and coming up with things to change around our house. That is what I love to do in my spare time. The problem is that it’s not about me anymore.

I went down to part-time in about October, but I still work 30+ hours a week. Two weeks ago, I worked full-time for several days and it sucked. I don’t know how many of you do it. I don’t know how I did it for months. My longer working hours contributed to my break from here, as did some family commitments, technical issues, Easton not sleeping well for a few weeks and just being dang tired and it goes on and on. And repeat. You’ve heard it all before.

Truth is, about 3 Mondays ago I started my week as usual, checked my blog stats and started to plan out my projects and posts for the week.

Monday: Photograph weekend project before Easton goes to bed but not after his dinner or when he’s in clingy meltdown mode

Tuesday: After bedtime edit and upload photos, hoping computer cooperates and doesn’t continually freeze, write post

Wednesday: Work on new project after bedtime

Thursday: Photograph, upload and post? Eh I’m short a day here

Friday: Collapse.

Saturday/Sunday: Scope out new project and work on it during naps/bedtime

As I planned out my week, I got mad at myself for not accomplishing enough over the weekend. “I should have painted x!” “Why haven’t we finished the office?” “We need to get those shelves up!”. I stopped myself for a minute. What the hell am I doing?

I wish this blog was my job, but it’s not. I would love to work hard enough that it is my job, but I know that idea is far fetched. I don’t want this blog (or reading other blogs) to make me feel like I’m not good enough– not working hard enough, not crafty enough, not organized enough. I started to feel like that, so I needed to step back.

This blog is fun for me and if it ever gets to feel like work, I need to step back and take a deep breath. My time with Easton when I get home from work is for Easton. I didn’t go down to part-time to blog or for projects. My weekends are for Easton, not for this blog or projects. If some weekends I have loads of energy and I’m inspired to get things done, then great! If some weekends I just want to take a nap with Easton, then I can’t get mad at myself. Easier said than done, but I am trying.

I’d rather give you posts that I am proud of than posts I threw together because I was tired…or because I had a great weekend with Mike and Easton…or because I was busy rolling around on the playroom floor when I should have been photographing in natural light.

When I had this discussion with Mike a few weeks ago, I asked him why I should keep blogging. His response was a) because you like it and and b) because some day, when we look back, we’ve created an amazing journal. Maybe I don’t post 6 days a week like I did when I first started (say whaaa?), but just like real life, this blog has peaks and valleys. Lately, more valleys than peaks, that’s okay with me. And that’s all it has to be.